The Grace of God

Grace-what is it, where does it come from. Hebrews 4:16 "Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need." To me grace feels so close. Daily, sometimes minute by minute I ask God for more. Sometimes I feel like I am begging and surely He is tired of me. Here I am again God - it's me again; I need more, please God. I even get demanding and say desperately: "Please God, hurry up, I can't do this on my own." There is always more, grace seems to be in endless supply. I am fascinated by what happens when I plead and ask for grace. In asking, I admit that I can't live life on my own, it's too big, over the edge. By admitting that I can't do it on my own, I am blessed with an abundance of peace. In feeling peace, I am freed from the cares of life. Sometimes it lasts for several days, sometimes for just a minute. People go through something hard and they look back and say: "If it wouldn't have been for the grace of God I wouldn't have survived." Right now, I feel God's grace so keenly that I feel it right now. I don't feel like I could live another minute without it. I am in awe of a God who has an endless supply of grace. I bow in thankfulness, realizing that if it wouldn't be for His grace, I wouldn't have the promise of eternal life. I want to get a hold of the verse in Ephesians 2:8 and live it out for the rest of my life in a deeper way. "For by grace ye are saved, not of yourselves, it is the gift of God." I spread my arms in praise, realizing that I wouldn't have been able to live the horrors of the last months without God's promise of endless grace. I face tomorrow knowing that once again I will be helpless, bent in pain, and there will again be enough grace for me to live the day.

At bedtime Kira would ask Merlin to "sing a new one." He would try and every time it wouldn't be the right one. Finally, he would sing "Jesus Loves Me" and then she was satisfied. "Jesus Loves Me" was new to her every day! Oh, the simplicity of salvation when it is viewed through the eyes of a child and Jesus' love.

It was hard to celebrate Father's Day yesterday. I feel like I almost avoided the pain, maybe good, maybe not. The pain of not having Kira here with us, the pain of not being able to watch Merlin with the three little girls was enormous for both of us. Thoughts go back to last year...but it will never be the same, yesterday is gone. Pray that we will continue to lean on God. Grace to embrace the reality of today. Pray that Merlin will continue to heal physically. We feel indebted for the care and love we feel and we pray that God will in turn bless you all richly.

Marylu and Merlin, Marlea, Anna